I THOUGHT

Hi, I'm Beng from Bulacan. Graduating student this coming August. I just want to share what I've experienced 2 weeks ago.

I came from a simple family. Sapat na makakain ng tatlong beses sa isang araw. Only child ako. Parehong nagtatrabaho ang mga magulang ko. Ang tatay ko ay driver ng tryk habang ang nanay ko naman ay nag aalaga ng bata.

Madalas ako maiwan sa bahay araw-araw kahit noong hindi pa pandemic. Maayos naman kami ng mga magulang ko, were good in terms (I guess) kahit hindi magkakasama araw-araw but syempre we have arguments din but "lambing arguments" ang matatawag ko. Nagkakapikunan kami ng mama ko sa mga hugasin, sa mga gawaing bahay. We both hate kalat. Ayaw na ayaw nila na umuuwi na makalat. Kaya I always challenge myself na everyday uuwi sila dapat malinis sa bahay. Everything goes well, uuwi sila maayos sa bahay, papasok sila sa trabaho ng maaga. And I didn't expect na maeexperience ko yung mga na-experience ng ibang tao.

One time, umuwi mama ko, saying na nag-positive daw yung tatay nung inaalagaan niya na bata. And for me, I was just chill because I was confident that time na she was okay lang, na I have faith ba na she's protected. But I didn't know that yung pagiging "chill" ko would end up sa sobrang pagka-worried.

For the next swab test, she became positive. And there was a pinch inside my heart. All the memories I had with my mom came back, the way na awayin ko siya, everytime na hindi ko na-appreciate yung mga ginagawa niya for me, yung pagalit niya kasi makulit ako na I thought trip niya lang ako pagalitan, everytime na mainit ulo ko because of school works, the way she leave me a note before she go to her work. I thought were okay, but were actually not. I realized how bad I was. How I lack and deprive them ng attention ko.

I thought okay lang na ganon ang set-up namin na uuwi sila, papasok sa work and maiiwan ako tapos paulit-ulit lang na routine. I thought ayos lang na hindi nag-uusap. I thought sapat na yung nanjan sila at nandito ako. I thought okay lang na hindi ako nag-iinitiate ng usapan or kwentuhan sa kanila. Mas nakikipagbiruan pa ako sa mga kaibigan ko kaysa sa kanila. I thought ayos lang na mabibilang sa daliri kung ilan lang pictures namin together.

But its not.

And I thought that time, mama ko lang but yung papa ko din nag-positive. They even told me na they have to leave for the protocol of isolation facility. And for the whole weeks they're gone, I just realized how important yung communication no matter how hard, how hectic yung sched ng bawat member ng family 'coz this is life. We never know what will happen in the next hours, days, weeks, months or years.

We always call each other, during their stay in the facility, we tend to call each other. And one thing I observed to them was, they were really happy and kinda funny to be with. Hindi pala sila boring, its just that ako lang kasi talaga yung hindi nag-initiate na makipagbiruan sa kanila because I always reason out na I was busy sa school, inaantok na ako amd whatever excuses.

I realized and see the worth of my parents. I see and understand na hindi lang lagi aral, hindi lang laging barkada ang inaatupag, hindi laging sila nanay at tatay lang ang may responsibilty satin. Its also our responsibility to take care of them. I learned how to be intentional and make time to those people around me.

Archt

2021

Architecture

BSU